random thoughts by mj

2006-01-27T00:38:00.000-08:00

Ok I have some very very very very random thoughts that I wish to share with you.

First one, If the grass was blue and pickles were green, would the sky be blue? I mean that is to say that something for something and everything has to be justitfied and diverting has to have a consequence.

Second of all, I thought about what the word hippy actually means. I was going to the fridge to grab a beer after I had had a couple of beers. I thought of what the word hippy could mean. I thought of it this way High we could call the Hi and happy we could call the ppy. So put it together what do you get. Hippy. That was one of the greatest opinion that I have had on my own.

Ok time to go back to there world and tell you how my life is going. Well I got my hair done and I am all pretty again. I started my myspace.com thing so you can reach me at myspace.com/mjgayborhood. I think My pics on there and everything represent what is actually the real me. I love my cat, my cat is a little eccentric, but I love him anyways. But sometimes think that he is the anti Christ and he does things to drive marshal crazy but I love him. So there is a but about my kitty so go to myspace and see a picture of my cat. He is just like me put him in a group of people and he will ham it up and be extra friendly to all the people in the room to get the most attention..

I got a new sex toy called the male g-spot stimulator. I love it it makes me and marshal cum a gallon, not that marshal doesn't come a gallon in my mouth, but I like to drink it. It makes me come twice as hard. I could eat his come everyday of the week. So that's my sex tip buy toys, if your dick could vibrate you wouldn't need them, but it can't so get over it. I love you all I am a bottom so don't take anything I say to heart. If I could take with my ass you wouldn't listen that's why I use my brains.

?Have a hip hoppy happy day, love ya'll.

2006-01-16T23:12:00.000-08:00

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Matt
Birthday: 3/3
Birthplace: Trenton, MI
Current Location: Chicago
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Brown/blonde
Height: 5'11''
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: Polish, Italian, Norwegian, German
The Shoes You Wore Today: Puma's
Your Weakness: Rims
Your Fears: Dying
Your Perfect Pizza: Garlic, Ham, and Bacon
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Get a different job
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: 'sup
Thoughts First Waking Up: God I'm Hard.
Your Best Physical Feature: Depends on whose looking where, uh my but.
Your Bedtime: 12, both of them
Your Most Missed Memory: I don't know, I forgot.
Pepsi or Coke: Coke Coke Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: BK
Single or Group Dates: Single, it's easier
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Neither
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Smoke: When I'm drunk.
Do you Swear: Yup!
Do you Sing: Nope!
Do you Shower Daily: Yup!
Have you Been in Love: Currently
Do you want to go to College: Went, want to go again.
Do you want to get Married: Gay? Married? Yeah? Maybe?
Do you belive in yourself: Yup!
Do you get Motion Sickness: Nope!
Do you think you are Attractive: Yup!
Are you a Health Freak: Nope!
Do you get along with your Parents: Yup!
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yup!
Do you play an Instrument: Used to play the trumpet
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: A whole lot
In the past month have you Smoked: A lot
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Do prescriptions count?
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yup, with Marshal
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Everyday
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No, yuck
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yeah, yummy
In the past month have you been on Stage: No, I was once, ask me about it.
In the past month have you been Dumped: No
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: No
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Does not paying a bar tab count
Ever been Drunk: Yeah
Ever been called a Tease: Yeah
Ever been Beaten up: No
Ever Shoplifted: Yeah
How do you want to Die: In my sleep or really quickly
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Who has to grow up?
What country would you most like to Visit:
New Zealand
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Brown
Favourite Hair Color: Brown
Short or Long Hair: Not short not long
Height: Taller than me
Weight: Bigger than me
Best Clothing Style: Dressy
Number of Drugs I have taken: Doesn't Matter
Number of CDs I own: I-Pod
Number of Piercings: Only 1 that could be peirced
Number of Tattoos: Doesn't Matter
Number of things in my Past I Regret: 3

2006-01-11T16:35:00.000-08:00

Ok I wrote this Journal entry in my online journal is 2001 and alot has changed since then, but I just thought it beared being reposted. Well,Ok I have not deicided what the fuck I really want to do yet. I am so lost and so confused but I am most deinitely narrowing down my choices. So I am either go to actually stay here and just move to campus. I have made some new friends there and they have alot of brand new on campus apartment type dealios so we'll see about that. The only thing I dont like about that is that once I send in my housig contract I cant get out of it unless I dont go to school there anymore. Well I could do that but because I could always go to school at the other campus which is closer. But see why this is so hard for me to decicide.
Ok then there #2 I was thinking about going home going to CC getting a job and saving some money so that way I could pay off some of my bills and things. Upside I will have an AA downside its detroit. Well I dont know about that but then that still leaves a problem of where to go when I am done with Detroit. Well thenI was thinking chicago isnt far from detroit and I could go to school and live by derek. Well I was thinking about that and thats all good but then again he wont be there much more then next year and I have two years left of school so then that leaves me all alone I am sure I can make friends but still I mean what do I do in that case. Well then there is like its so cold there.
So then I was thinking about moving back to seattle. I did have alot of friend there. I would have alot of friends there and I would have alot more friend there if it wasnt for my overly judgemental abuse asshole ex boyfriend. But I dont know if I Want to go back there cuz it is really expensive but I could live with my friend josh and we could share the rent and live up on capital hill with all the other people. Sounds like fun. Then I would still have to do the CC thing and then I could go to UW and jus tpay through the nose for my tution. But at least I could say it was fun.
Then there is the matter of me going to hawaii. I could move to hawaii and live with my brother he said that we could get a house there becasue he gets 1000$ a month for housing and he friend BillyBart (dont ask) gets 1000$ and he said a decent house would run about 2000$. so if I chipped in some of the bills money like say 700$ which is about what I pay for rent and bills now then we could live in a house. I like that Idea. Plus I will be where it is warm and alot of fun. That whole gay culture thing helps but ahh I could live with out it most of the time. Minus- I will be so fucking far away from home the more I try the further I get. I dont understand how that happens. Well its time to start applying to colleges again email me please and tell me that I am not the only person in the world who wants to go to school and get my dergree but is having hard time finding a road to do so. Well thats its as far as school goes.
SO ok I am getting cable today I am so excited today I cant wait cable cable cable. The guy is here right now. HE was telling me how he got invited for Montel because he was in a love triangle and then had a kid. Well thats just messed up but who cares I have cable. Well in a few minutes I suppose thats all that really counts. If he didnt have my tv I would so not talk to him. He used words like kin-folk and dirty laundry. So we dont like him too much. I mean who really has dirty laundry anyways. So Lets take a vote more poeple need to read this. Ok here the vote I am doing it anways but how many people would fly from tampa to Los Angels Well I am so we'll see how that goes as far as the rest of everything goes I made a new friend and found a new job but I have to lose the old one first. So Love Ya'll bye
ME AND YOU NOT HERE NO MORE

2006-01-09T23:48:00.000-08:00

Ok well today as I was on my way to the Dr.'s I thought to myself whose job is it to make sure all the elevator buttons light up, and furthermore how do you change them? I don't know. On to more serious matters, I went to the doctor because I was sick. I have an Upper Respiratory Infection and I have Asthma, which means, uh hello, I can't breathe. So I though the usual round of steroids, antibiotics, and inhalers would do the trick. Well I have to go see the holistic approach doctor, who gave me some prescription strength sudafed. So to make a long story short I went back to work this week and I can't breathe. So what am I going to do, I am going to see another doctor on Wed. It's so awful I hate it. I need to be able to work, I still can't walk that great and now I am sick. So if any of you live in the greater Chicago Area, STAY AWAY from the Northwestern Mermorial Center For Intergrative Medicine. These are the same people I went to see when I had strep throat and they gave me medicine that was so antiquated that it doesn't work on strep anymore. I had a fever of 104 before I finally went to the ER and told them what happened. So I am never ever going to she that bitch again. I have had bronchitis quite frequently in the past and I need antibiotics to help clear it up. The straw that broke the camels back was when the bitch told me, I have had a slight cough for 6 weeks now, I should have walked out right there. Well wish me luck with the other doctor. BTW I know there are alot of mistakes in the spelling and grammer, but remember, I'm sick

2006-01-07T00:31:00.000-08:00

I learned a lot about life today,
A friend, a stranger and I started to pray.
Pray for the answer that would tell me why,
Then I started to think, and I started to cry.

I found the answer deep in my heart,
I prayed that life would give me a new start.
I learned that the power of love was strong,
With love, hope, and faith, maybe I could conquer a wrong?

Love is the strongest power, believe!
Not the head, not the hand and now I see.
I've learned that the heart can see with the eyes not around,
that the voice of a lover can be heard without a sound.

With love, I've learned forgiveness is key
A lover can forgive, but can I forgive me?
The only way to forgive and finally be free.
Is to learn for myself to finally love me.

2006-01-03T09:26:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year.

Well let's see where to begin on how my weekend went. We all know that I am still not back to work, but I found out today that I will be going back on Sunday, So Yay, no more sitting around the house. Back to the weekend, I decided since I was off to start my festivities on Friday, well after a night of drinking on Friday and the early part of the day on Saturday, I was so exhausted by Saturday night that all I wanted to do was sleep. Isn't that ironic, the actual moment that I was partying for, was about the time I wanted to sleep, but I stayed up and rang in the New Year with Marshal and my Best Friend. We had a lot of fun, just playing games and hanging out. I am feeling much better today and ready to just relax and enjoy my last few days off to sleep.

Tips to successful Partying
1. Don't party until the part is supposed to start
2. Make sure you always have a DD, that way you can party hop not matter how trashed you get.
3. Make sure you go to the liquor store early, it's not fun to be a little drunk and waiting in line for a half and hour to buy 12 cans of beer that you could've gotten early that day.
4. Combine with #3, when you make that last minute trip to the liquor store, your friends with ask you to pick of stuff for them, another reason to go early.
5. Never go to a party without aspirin in your pockets, early morning hangovers suck.
6. Party with friends not with strangers, that way if you forget what happened someone will remember.
7. Carry a bright light with you, that way when you party hop, you can shine it in your eyes before you get to the next party, this will shrink your pupils making you appear less drunk.
8. Altoids should always be with you, self explanatory.
9. Bring a change of clothes, for two reasons, you can freshen up in the morning so you don't look so awful and if you spill, burn, or do something else to you clothes, you can change.
10. Last, but certainly important, Visine really does get the redness out.

2005-12-29T15:45:00.000-08:00

Things I've learned over the last week....

1. It's possible on Christmas eve to make it to Target, the liquor Store, and get into a car accident between 5:15 and 6:00 when the liquor store closes at 6:00.
2. No matter how last minute, it's never to late to make it home for Christmas.
3. Getting what you want for Christmas doesn't involve getting what you want.
4. Christmas sex is better if you wait two days later. (by then it's built up)
5. Having a white Christmas depends on where the airline delays are.

But most importantly having loving friends, a boyfriend, and family meant the most to me this holiday season. I am glad it's over but with out them it never would have started...... Funny thing about Christmas, some people complain, some keep up with the Jone's, some people buy nice presents, some people can't afford any, and some people travel long distances to spend Christmas where their heart is.

No matter what the motivation behind Christmas, family and friends is the common denominator. With out family and friends to share Christmas with, it would just be another day of the year. Be thankful for those you have, and remember those you don't. Through our Christmas thoughts and prays, everyone wins. Always remember you can't hug yourself....

2005-12-21T11:27:00.000-08:00

10 reason why being gay at Christmas is better!

1. With the drug epidemic among gay people, it's always a white christmas.
2. With the exception of a few progressive religions, you don't have to go to church.
3. It's so much easier to get your stocking stuffed..
4. Gay people get to have more than one Christmas tree.
5. If you find yourself alone on Christmas day, there's always Gay.com.
6. Sitting on Santa's lap is somewhat erotic.
7. Since you don't have kids to buy for, you can buy your pets that Gucci collar they've been eyeing.
8. It's socially acceptable to ditch your family and spend the holiday in Fiji.
9. Making a Christmas Merry, usually involves a drag queen named Mary.
10. Who needs an excuse to go shopping when you're gay.

Well that's all I have for now, write me, I love feedback.

2005-12-20T03:24:00.001-08:00

Well it's so cold outside that is sucks to try and go anywhere here in the Windy City, but hey at least I'm not in New York. Seriously though when it's one degree out and you have to walk very slowly or take a cab somewhere, it really just makes you want to stay inside. Which incidentally is driving me crazy, but life goes on. I haven't really had any crazy dreams lately and things are going back to normal between Marshal and me. He goes back to work today, how exciting for him. I am stuck at home for at least the next two weeks, but at least it gets me out of work retail at the holidays. I think I might go out and do a little shopping today, I have to buy Everyone's Christmas gifts and find out what is going on. I think this year most everyone except for Marshal is just going to get gift cards, but that still means I have to go out to buy them, but aw well what can ya do. I know I am a little on the broke side till I return to work because the disability doesn't pay the full amount that I used to make. So blah blah blah,

Have you ever had a dream that was scary and you didn't know why it was? I had one of those today I woke up and ran in the bedroom cuz I was scared. I still don't know exactly what it was about.

Random thought, if you put your panty hose in the freezer, they won't run, but who the hell would want to put on frozen underwear? Not me, I like the boys nice and toasty.....

2005-12-20T03:24:00.000-08:00

2005-12-14T04:55:00.000-08:00

Ok so here it goes again. Randomness. I was thinking today that whatever you stick you dick in, it comes out smelling worse then it went it. Ironic isn't it. I mean with a few exceptions of the twat hungry straight guys, most would agree that eau de twat doesn't smell all that great. Well being gay, you know that ass doesn't exactly smell good, even when it's as pristine as mine. I suppose when you suck a cock it has the best probably for smelling good. It all depends on the circumstances, it could smell like vodka, coke, smoke, garlic, or some other horrible concoction for those hookers that don't brush and floss, but on the other hand, it could smell better. I find that sometimes the refreshing minty tingle of crest can be nice, or some people just naturally have good breath. Well I guess ya'll know what that means start sucking more cock so you don't have to use as much water to wash your dirty dick, thus reducing environmental pollution.

Random Thought, if you eat garlic mashed potatoes, then what comes out smells just the same.

2005-12-11T11:12:00.000-08:00

Ok so not that I am into this sorta thing, but it is still food for thought. I was wondering if it would be possible to shit or even pee for that matter up someone's nose. Ok I know its gross but it is most def a random thought. Picture this you are sitting on someone's face and you put your ass real tight on their nose. Like we're talking the nose has to be practically up your asshole. So now that you have the situation, would it be possible. I am thinking yes, but where would it go, I mean it would taste nasty or would you taste it at all. Hmn... I don't know cuz it might just slid right down like a jello shot, then again it might come back up like a bad oyster. Furthermore, if you ate it could you get E Coli, probably. So I guess the general consensus is to not have someone shit up your nose.

2005-12-10T05:49:00.000-08:00

Ok let's see...... Oh yeah communications. Well the problem is that if you don't communicate properly no one will understand what the fuck is going thru your head. I have been upset lately mostly from being cooped up in the house. Well I did not communicate my needs properly to Marshal and so the two of us got in sort of a fight. I have basically been depressed from being stuck in the house for so long. Well I just wanted company and Marshal sorta internalized the problem making it his. Well it wasn't his and it was me. So now that we have actually talked about the way we feel and the event as it actually happened I feel a lot better. I guess it's weird when you have the first relationship that you ever really have to communicate. When you're 21 and gay you can just tell someone to fuck off and go out and ignore the problem completely. But when you are in a serious relationship that is supposed to last for a longer period of time, the adult thing to do is communicate you're feelings and understand the other person's feelings.

Boy this whole love thing is tricky tricky tricky, when you actually care about someone you also have to care about what they think. Two completely different things. Well I feel a lot better and I go back to work tomorrow. I don't want to go back to work on one hand, but on the other it will be nice to get back to business as usual. Well that's about all I have for now.

Random thought, did you know that if you sue the EPA you actually have to file a lawsuit directly against the Director of the EPA. Imagine how many lawsuits he gets.

2005-12-08T22:58:00.000-08:00

Ok Let's blog. I think that this one will be slightly a little more on the serious side. I know I know. But let's see Marshal and I have actually been cooped up in the house together for way too long. We have been at each other’s throat. I think that part of the problem is that when you are dating someone you need a proper outlet to bitch. But you just don't need one outlet you need a few outlets, you need friends, you need to go out and do things. And by things I mean that you need to be AWAY from each other. I broke my foot and I am about broke my relationship in half. So here's how the story goes....... There is this guy Mr. K who some how became friends with my boyfriend. They seem to like each other and they are both cute.... Conclusions can be drawn from that alone. Now there is another person involved in the circle Mr. M and Mr. K are sort of kind of, you know gay dating friends sort of thing. Now Mr. M is best friends with my boyfriend. So here is the question, should Mr. K and my boyfriend be "friends" or not. See it's not that I want to be suspicious of anything. Mr. M and I agree that my boyfriend could potentially have the possibility of being something if something ever happened between my boyfriend and me. I think that is what bothers me the most. Not so much the fact that they are friends but I don't think that there should already be a potential back up in place. To me it's like going to the bar and giving someone your phone number to call you in months. How is that supposed to make someone who is already insecure about themselves feel that they could be replaced. Now. Let's see since this is supposed to be random thoughts I had this horrible breaking point fight with my boyfriend over mother fucking fried rice. He put Lemon on my friend rice and I freaked out and starting packing my bags and told him that I was leaving.

2005-12-03T00:54:00.000-08:00

MJ's dick dream

So I decided to write a little bit about the dream I had last night it was very odd. Very Very Very odd. I think it had to do with the pain killers I was on because of my foot. Although it's supposed to be all better, it still hurts. Well I think that is part of the weird dreams. Ok So It was my apartment and my Christmas tree, all faggggggggggged out with Radko stuff. Well under the tree were all these presents, like more presents then I have ever had before. Well it must have been Christmas morning cuz I woke up, in my dream, and started opening all my presents. Well every present was a cock. Like all different cocks, they weren't like cut off or anything like that they just looked like normal dicks. Like Maybe every dick I have ever seen. I am not sure there were big ones and smalls ones and some funny shaped ones. One that particularly stood out, one that I was found out attractive was one that resembled my boyfriends. Although, I am pretty sure it was his, I am not sure because there were no faces in the dream. But it had a big head that just plunges right in there and hits that spot. After that, the other cocks didn't seem to matter at all. So I was staring at this one dick in my dream and in the background there were all these other cocks. So anyways it was so hotttttttttt!!!!! cuz there was my boyfriends cock with all these other cocks, but his was the only one that was hard. So I woke up with this huge hard dick, like bigger and harder then it’s ever been before. So I woke up next to my boyfriend, but the rest is classified information. So that was my dream, maybe I should change the name MJ's dream blog.

Ok now that's over December 1st was world's AIDS day and I wanting everyone to take a moment to pray or do what ever you do for the victims.

Here my random though for the day, one time my dad called this baby on TV ugly and it really hurt me for some reason. I wasn't the cutest child and when my dad said that I thought that maybe he thought I might be ugly too. Well I have never told anyone about that so there you go world.

2005-11-28T07:59:00.000-08:00

Blog #2 This shit is kinda fun. Well it's fun to write about your life and who knows maybe I will have enough in my blog to write a book about myself someday. Well that is a bit over zealous for now, but at least I made it to #2.

What to write about to day..........

What is the easiest way to get up in the morning. Sometimes I get up in the morning and I can just tell that it is going to be a great day, but then there are other days where you just have a hard time getting up. I am sure it has something to do with your REM sleep or some shit like that or maybe it has something to do with the way you go to bed. I think that is more the case. If you go to bed in a bad mood then you will wake up in a bad mood and vice versa. So well I guess you can figure out what type of morning today was, a bad one, I am way grouchy.

Now I am going to tell you something that I hate just about more than anything in the world. I hate getting out of the shower in a cold room. I actually go to extremely great lengths to make sure that I don't have to deal with a cold room. First when I get ready to get in the shower I don't just strip down and jump in the shower. If its really cold I actually have a small heater that I put in the bathroom and shut the door because it gets nice a toasty in there. If it's not all that cold I just turn the shower on kinda warm and let the steam heat up the bathroom. After about five minutes or so when everything in the bathroom is warm I get all naked and get in the shower making sure the bathroom door is shut tight. Then I get in the shower and before I start washing I take water and wet the walls around the edge of the shower just a little bit so that the shower liner will stick to the walls, this prevents any drafts, thus preventing me from being cold. After washing I aim the shower away from me, so I am not getting wet. The I dry off with the shower still going. Once dry I shut the shower off and I am ready to go on my day. When I was in college because of the fan vent in the bathroom that couldn't be shut off, I used to have take paper and cloth and put it over the vent so all the warm air couldn't escape.

Ok so maybe that sounds a little nutty. but I hate being cold. I hate hate hate it. I think I want to move someplace down in the south where I could be warmer most of the year. I mean heat and fire places are all great, but who can beat a beach with the sun beating down on your skin. I don't think many people would disagree with that.

Well I am finished blogging for the day check back soon as another interesting update will be sure to follow.

And remember is your hole is as a big as a bucket,
Find someone as big as a rocket,
To fuck it.

2005-11-27T15:19:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I decided to start blogging it's my answer to the Podcast and hopefully it will be a great addition to the Gayborhood Radio family. Let' see where to start.....

I think I should start with a little about me. I have a B.S. in Environmental Science and Policy and I am hoping to go to grad school although who nose or knows but who knows what or when I will, but I would consider myself one of those green people that will eventually get on a soapbox about various environmental issues. I also love to cook, so if you have any of the to die for recipes please email them to me as I will add them to my cook book.

Well, I had a dream last night that was a little freaky, well actually it was way freaky and it scared the shit out of me. I had a dream that I was being attacked by vampires, why vampires, I have no fucking idea. I am not even afraid of them or maybe I am I just didn't know it until now. Anyways back to the dream. So I was being attacked by vampires they were flying around my apartment and I was trying to run and hide from them, but it didn't work. Thank God I woke up before they got to me. So I woke up and you think I would be like thank God I woke up, but instead I started looking out the window to see if there were vampires out there. Then I tried to go back to sleep when I realized I fell asleep on the couch. So I hopped (cuz of the broken foot) into the bedroom and curled up with Marshal as close as I could. Then I realized I wasn't under the covers so I got under the covers because it made me feel safer and harder to bite if there was a vampire in my room. Then I remembed that vampires had to be invited into your home before they could get you. Well I had the cable people here last week and then I started thinking that they could be vampires and they might get me. Finally I fell asleep and woke up again when it was light out.

So ok it being light out makes poeple feel safer, why? It should be the same in the dark. MY problem is I feel safer sleeping in the day, why because of the light. I don't know it's kinda crazy because it's harder to fall asleep when it's light out. I have it, I have the idea. I am going to get a dream catcher then I wont have to worry about it. If anyone knows where to get them let me know.

Well other then my crazy dream I am just excited that I get to go back to work. It will be so nice to be not in the house for a little while. I am sure that I will be over work after a couple of days, but for now I am looking forward to it. Other than that let's see....

I am always looking for a quick way to make some money or to find a new and more exciting career then retail managemet. So if anyone has any ideas Email me. The only idea that I had was doing some time of porn show from my house. It would be cool, I would only do it solo or wish Marshal, but the thought of people getting off to me is hot. I just have no idea how to do the logistics, but it would be cool. So if anyone knows how to set up a pay porn site give me an Email and tell me how to do it.

Well I have babbled on long enough, so check back often and Email me. Also look for me on a very special Editon of Gayborhoodradio. Check out the site at Gayborhoodradio.com.

Love Ya'll MJ